Border terrier tired of being an arsehole

A five-year-old Border terrier has decided he is tired of being an arsehole.

Fergus Magnusson, who lives just outside Glasgow, says he’s been a real arsehole for as long as he can remember, and is finding it exhausting.

He told The Lab Report: “It takes it out of you being this much of an arsehole. You have to snap and growl at nice people wanting to say hello, and give that nice postman a whole load of grief.

“Screaming at cars for no reasons is tiring, as is starting trouble with dogs who simply want to smell my bum.”

Magnusson was born in a loving home with a large garden and, like his parents, gets all the stimulation, comfort, food and attention he could wish for.

“I don’t know why we have to be like this,” he said. “I hate myself.”

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