A Nottinghamshire dog has told friends that he fully intends to cross a busy road to sniff the trousers of a passing walker.
Joshua Barley, a ten-year-old golden retriever, let it be known that even though he was up-wind of the target, he had “an instinct” about these things and felt strongly that the trousers warranted further investigation.
Barley spotted the trousers – an ageing pair of mustard corduroys – on the body of Robert Pilkington, a semi-retired arts journalist who was on his way to buy a newspaper.
“All the signs are there,” the dog told his companions. “There’s a bagginess in the trousers which, coupled with a slight discolouration around the crotch, suggests they hadn’t been washed for a while, and I’d be lying if I claimed that didn’t add to the allure.
“In addition, there is a mild fraying around the hem – a clear indication that much ground has been covered. As far as I’m concerned, a deep sniff of one of those bad boys is as good as a holiday.”
Barley did indeed run through traffic to smell the corduroys, resulting in a Volvo veering off the road to avoid hitting him.
Witnesses heard him confirming that the dash had been well worth the risk, as the trousers smelled faintly of urine, red wine, cheese and veal, and Mr Pilkington was also carrying a half-eaten artisan sausage roll, which he happily parted company with after Barley licked it.