Rigby Madeiros, a six-year-old Labrador, has declared his eternal love for a shoe.
The cream-coloured dog woke up on Valentine’s Day and told the shoe: “You’re the one for me, baby. I adore you so much sometimes I think my heart will explode in my chest.”
It was love at first sight when Rigby first encountered the battered Converse trainer ten months ago.
“Our first few weeks together were wild,” he said. “We just clicked, you know? I’d sneak the shoe into my basket at night, and several times over the subsequent months I’d have to rescue it from the rubbish bin.
“They tried to keep us apart but the attraction was too strong.”
He admitted that he knew from experience that ardour can diminish over time, and had been trying to “take it slow”, but this was definitely “the real thing”.
“We’re ready to tell the world that we’re in it for the long haul. I know that in some communities this would be considered ‘the love that dare not speak its name’ but love is more powerful than hate and fear.
“This shoe makes me a better version of myself. This is real. Love is real.”